How do you deal with depression and anxiety?
How do you deal with depression and anxiety that comes with being Indie? How do you deal with doubt which creeps in and all the thoughts which reduce your productivity and makes you feel miserable?
I found myself to be very negative and depressed sometimes. Usually, I stop working, read a few chapters of some sci-fi book, and get a very long sleep. Once not tired and rested, I'm quite positive again and happy to work!
been there and faced this situation. going solo is always difficult, that's why it is highly recommended to have a partner in business. Seeing progress is the best way to fight depression/anxiety feeling. Change your mindset of progress on internal factors (pushing code, launching, feedback with customers) rather than external factors (revenue, traction). Later will only serve as an indicator for path correction of what you are building. Apart from work, have another hobby or regular workout routine where you can see the progress on daily basis. This piece is completely under your control and can serve as a positive thing in low days. Invest time in building a strong support system. You need positive people around. Family and friends will play an important role here. You need people to have general chat on regular basis (not necessarily work-related things). Communities like these also help. This is the single most important piece of advice that can help you sail through a difficult time. Money in the bank always gives confidence, but if that's not there it's not a big deal. You just have to survive through this phase, and enjoy building stuff.
For me hobbies and keeping busy are very important because sometimes distractions can get you out of some senseless stuff we think about randomly but I also take at least an hour a day to mediate, there's many ways of doing it, I usually sit in silence, breathe, feel and connect with my body. For me It helps clear my mind, get through difficult situations and seeing problems more clearly for what they are. It has also helped me identify what is triggering me to be anxious or going into a state of depression. Sometimes problems and what we feel can't be repressed by being s busy body, I do an hour a day but it's because of habit. I started in college with just a few minutes a week while I modeled since I had to be still and focus on my breathing to hold posing for extended periods of time. It grew after that and made it habit of always taking an hour and completely unwind and let go of everything that happens daily. There's also nothing wrong with seeing or speaking to someone if you're are unable to identify what are the elements triggering you, it doesn't have to be a professional, you'd be surprised of what your friends notice.
I asked a similar questionon Twitter recently. For me, the anxiety comes often from the fact that I am unsure if the choices I make bring me closer to my goal.
As a remedy, I usually talk about it with friends and other indies. Last year about the same time I also went for a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. If you haven't try that as it may help you better understand yourself and tweak your thoughts and behavior.
I'll be honest, I am completely terrified every time I put something out. I have zero confidence in myself or my ability.
I am driven entirely by the fact that perhaps what I do might help someone or bring people together.
The only reason I am able to do it is because you will never know the impact you can make unless you push yourself.
Don't get comfortable, being scared is one of the only emotions that will drive you to a conclusion.
IMO if you have a time to be depressed you just not busy enough. Start new project, get your hands dirty with the work you will not have a time for bad emo state. If you miss people, go to do some shopping and talk to shop keepers. It's their job to be nice to prospects. Honestly complement their shop about something you noticed. You will feel better.
That's is not only what works for me but is also teached and preached by others. I took some good advices how to deal with depression from https://www.amazon.com/Worrying-Start-Living-Personal-Development/dp/0749307234 long time ago. IMO it's better than "How to win friends…".
@doomhammer I understand your point, but I didn't say we should work more, but to get busy instead. Working more could drive us to workaholism as you said which we definitely want to avoid. What I mean by staying busy instead, is doing so many things that we don't have time to seat and worry about anything. By being busy I mean volunteering, reaching out to other people instead of waiting to be reached, organize meetings rather to wait for somebody else to organize, fixing things rather than complaining about something not work the way it should, building something rather criticize somebody else works, etc. It means having a proactive attitude. Even during a pandemic, we can still fill our schedule to the top, so we don't have a window of time to think of how depressed we are. For more details on how it works check out the book, I mentioned in my original comment.
I found the depression hits mostly when I have too much spare time, but I never feel it while I'm busy doing something.
Other things that help me to fight depression or get into a better mood, most requires a bit of effort:
- listen to positive music - just found something that you feel better after you listen
- watching cats and animals on YouTube
- playing with animals
- talking to people, even strangers
- aromatherapy - natural, pure essentials oils are proven to have medical benefits. Try citrus ones: orange, lemon, etc.
- exercises - I never feel depressed after I do a workout
- hiking with others
- find your community, get inspired by their work, do something on your own and share experience with them - satisfy the need of belonging to a like-minded group of people
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